Unlike my husband, I loathe going through self check-outs in supermarkets and department stores.

Leaving aside my more philosophical musings about lost opportunities for social interaction, I invariably find myself struck by the curse of “unexpected item in the bagging area”. Which means waiting while someone comes to punch in a digital “abracadabra” to get the thing working again.

I just don’t understand why it keeps happening to me.

I follow all the instructions.
I push the “Brought my own bags” button.
I put them all in the required place.
I scan, pack and wait.
Swipe, beep. Swipe, beep.

Swipe…Not again. The gentle, pleasant but firmly insistent voice is informing me that there’s an unexpected item in the bagging area. Huh? How? So I’m stuck. Again. None the wiser about why it doesn’t seem to work for me but it does for everyone else.

Few things have the capacity to frustrate me as swiftly and completely as this phrase. It’s faintly humiliating to be in a public place, certain that you have done everything correctly yet still needing help.

I wonder how often similar scenarios play out in our kids’ lives, be they special needs or not. How
many situations must they encounter where they think they’ve followed all the right steps, listened to instructions, done what they ought to, but things just aren’t working out. And I’m willing to bet that most of these situations occur in public places – the classroom, the playground, even the home environment. How intensely frustrating for them. How discouraging.

Let’s reflect for a moment. Do our kids always get the help they need? Do we always recognise
their need for it? Even adults find it hard to ask for help. If you have special needs, you
mightn’t really understand how to articulate the request, or even recognise the importance of
asking for help when it can be so much easier to give up. It’s demoralising to fail when you think
you’ve done everything necessary to succeed.

Parents, carers and teachers bear a great responsibility to be aware of those “unexpected items” in our kids’ “bagging areas”. But we should all be aware. A confident, resilient child with the capacity to deal with frustration and the ability to ask for help will have more to offer society than one who feels that they’re stuck in the bagging area, overwhelmed by “unexpected items” and not getting the help they need to move on.